The White Snow - Pt - 1

The White Snow is being waited for long now. I see through my windows the weather is becoming dull day by day, all day long the Sun hides behind the clouds, may be it is shy, but it does hides behind the clouds, and I feel that it has betrayed me. The autumn has shed the leaves from the trees; I can see the bare trees from my windows, at length and at great distance. They are spread far and wide, and the cold winter fog blurs my vision when I try to look far away at the horizon. My obsession with the horizon has been for long now. I look at different horizon around me, choose one, and go down the path, the path is difficult, it not as I imagined, not a bit. I feel that Tyche has betrayed me, or may be abandoned me, as I see, that she has favoured many around me. I am still ignorant of my sins that I may have committed, but in my simple past life I find no such flaw according to the ethics of the modern world. My feelings are portrayed by the dull grey cold weather. I sit in this four cornered room, where I am protected from cold winds and rain. I have forgotten what the cold winds feels like, what the chills in the spine feel like, but I will be soon feeling that. I had expected more from Life before I came to this mechanical, yet beautiful world, but, my dreams and imagination has fallen and lost in the worries, fears and a disease. Everything has halted; it feels like the some superior power has halted everything and ordered me to ponder on what is happening with me. It has pulled me away from the worries and fears and strains and pressures, but, in a form of a disease. Well, no one in this Universe can go against what has been written. The afternoon seems dull as ever and this adds to my despair and sadness, when I look back two months, I feel what a life had I been living. The worries and stress and strains had taken a shape of a deadly disease, though, it is curable, no doubt in that. But, still I think and ponder about what this strange turn in my life means. I have had plenty of rest and food here. Plenty of time to talk my heart out to my family and ful-fill the time had I spent keeping the strange secrets in my heart, thus making it heavier day by day.